Splitting Heirs

Tale Spin Fan Fic

by Katie Sullivan

Chapter 5

10 Oct 1945

Kit Cloudkicker was a man of freedom, but something about Sue brought his feet down to earth more often than he cared to admit.  On one such evening, he dropped by the hotel downtown where her father worked: The Fritz Carlton.   He walked past the snooty badger doorman and up to the desk clerk.   "Hiya, Reggie," he said, enjoying the flamingo's startled expression at his casual attitude.  Most everyone in the place was either a rich snob or a kowtowing servant.  He was neither, as evidenced by his well-worn leather flight jacket and trademark backwards baseball cap.  He leaned against the counter and glanced over the names in the guest registry as the desk clerk went into the office to let Sue know he was there.

The usual upper-class names.  Foreign dignitaries.  Names followed by things like "Esq.", "PhD", "Sr.", "Jr.", "III", and such.  Kit stifled a yawn.  Somewhere behind him there was the annoying yapping from some heiress' poodle.

At last, Sue's gentle voice greeted him.  "Hello, Kit!   I wasn't expecting you until eight!"  She came out from behind the counter, and they shared a quick, modest kiss.

"Miz Cunningham is having the office painted," he said.   "It reeks to high heaven!  Anyway, I was wondering if you wanted to go for a spin.  She's making Baloo help her paint, so I've got the Sea Duck for the evening."  His eyes danced with enthusiasm, his fingers already itching to feel the smooth stick of the plane.

Sue gave a small, sad smile.  "Oh, gee, Kit, I'd love to, really, but I've got so much work to do here--"

"That's what Miz Cunningham always says, and she never has any fun!  Come on, Sue, what's one evening?  Your dad works you too hard."

"I need the money.  I'm sorry."

"What do you have to do?  I'll help.  It'll take half the time, and we'll be in the sky before you know it."

"It's mostly paperwork, but..." She put a finger to her cheek and thought.  "I know!  You can deliver the breakfast room service menus to the upper floors!"

"Breakfast menus?  Geez..." Kit wrinkled his nose.   "Can't these people make their own breakfast?  Or at least bother to get dressed and come down to the dining room?"

"Nope.  They pay for the luxury.  Now are you going to help or not?" she asked with a playful tweak at the brim of his cap.

He readjusted his cap and sighed.  "If it means you'll come flying with me, fine.  Let's get it over with."

Sue grinned and gave him a peck on the cheek.  "Oh, thank you, Kit.  You're a doll."  She shoved a stack of menus into his hands.   "Just slip one under the door of each room on the top five floors.  Oh, and don't forget the penthouse, too.  There's some rich Italian guy staying there.   He tips well."

Kit took the menus under his arm and headed for the elevator.   "Okay.  I'll be back before you know it.  Now get your boring old paperwork done so we can get out of here!"

"Roger, Captain Cloudkicker," she said with a laugh and a mock salute.

Sparkling crystal lamps cast soft light over the corridors of the Fritz Carlton. Kit stepped off the elevator, ignored the meerkat operator's outstretched hand, and went about the business of distributing the menus. It wasn't a difficult task by any stretch of the imagination. He simply had to slip a menu card under the door of each hotel suite.

The only thing keeping Kit from intense boredom was the promise of soon being behind the controls of the Sea Duck with Sue at his side. He would practice the Baloo Corkscrew, and Sue would tell some of her corny jokes, and maybe they'd stop at Louie's to share a Krakatoa Special. Just as soon as he delivered these stupid menus...

Kit scurried down the hallway, shoving menus under doors as quickly as he could.

At long last he was down to one remaining menu. He stood for a moment, wondering if he had accidentally skipped a room. Then he remembered what Sue had said about the penthouse. Swearing under his breath, he rushed to the elevator once more. The attendant gave a sour look upon seeing him yet again, but sent the car upward without a comment or a tip.

The orange "P" above the door lit up, and the doors swished open. Waiting for the elevator was a hulking figure that was unmistakably Dumptruck. He wore an ill-fitting suit and a ridiculously obvious fake mustache. Kit's heart skipped a beat in surprise. What in the world was he doing here? He managed to hide his astonishment, and slipped past the dog into the hall before he was recognized. Dumptruck obliviously got on the elevator and, in his thick Swedish accent, told the meerkat to head for the lobby. The doors slid shut, and all was still in the small stretch of corridor. Kit stood, blinking in amazement, as he tried to size up the situation.

Dumptruck, here? Why? And if he was here, logic dictated that other pirates were nearby. But again, why? Whatever it was, it couldn't be good. That much was a safe bet. What was that Sue had mentioned, about the penthouse being occupied by an Italian...?

It seemed wise to relocate himself, and soon. The last thing he needed tonight was a run-in with Air Pirates. He considered ringing for the elevator, but what if Dumptruck wasn't safely to the lobby? In close quarters, he had no doubts he would recognize his Captain's former protégé. No, better to take the stairs... Wait a minute...over eighty flights would take quite some time to descend. Kit grimaced. If he didn't hurry, he'd never get up in the Sea Duck that night. Not an option!

All these thoughts flew through his head in the space of just a few seconds. As he hastily considered his next move, his sharp ears picked up on a conversation coming from within the penthouse.

"...idiots! If you do anything to ruin this, I will have you personally beheaded, and then I will hang you!" a heavily accented male voice was saying.

A female cleared her throat.

"Okay, so I will hang them, and then behead them! Do not correct me when I am ranting!" Someone muttered something which Kit couldn't quite make out, and then the accented voice said, "Because I am the Captain, and you are a stupid idiot with brains that would not fill a teacup! Now, remember, we can not set off the bomb in the police station until right before the attack is to begin. The timing is verrry important! As soon as the Iron Vulture is through the cliffs, Ratchet will use the radio to give the signal. While the police are busy being blown up, and Khan is crying over his broken-up planes, and the train tunnel is closed up with the other bomb, I will personally take care of the cliff guns. Triggerfinger!"

"Yes, Captain?"

"You are certain you will be on duty the evening of the eleventh?"

"Yessir."

"Excellent. I am counting on you to see that the cliff guns are not in operationalness that night."

"I've got it all taken care of."

"Yes. You are not too very stupid, when compared to your cranially-challenged compatriots."

"Er, thanks, Captain."

"Now. Will, you and Scotty go back to Pirate Island tonight. Make sure that the Iron Vulture is full of fuel, and loaded with all the ammunition."

"And water the plants in our cabin," said the female.

"No problem," Will said.

"Yes, yes, whatever," said the accented voice. "Scarlet and I will join you tomorrow, after we take care of the Khan planes. I want everything shippedy-shape when I arrive, or I will use your kneecaps for coasters!"

A second female voice was heard. "Eeew!"

"Shut up, Katarina. Now, my men, you all know what to do. Get going. Oh, and, Mad Dog, after Dumptruck returns with Scarlet's ice cream, you two should go with Ratchet. He will show you what to do when you arrive at the Khan airfield. Okey-dokey?"

A round of grumbled "Yes, sirs" was heard, and then the sound of people getting out of chairs.

Kit reminded himself to breathe. Don Karnage, and his top pirates, were all in that penthouse! There was no doubt about the identity of the speakers. Kit knew them all.

He had to warn Sue, and warn the Shore Patrol, and-- He looked down at the stiff paper in his hand. And deliver the damn menu. No, forget that!

At the sound of numerous footsteps approaching the door, Kit sprang into action. There was no time to wait for the elevator. He'd have to use the stairs. He bolted toward the door, only to find it locked. No matter how much he muttered profanity and jiggled the doorknob, it refused to open. He whirled around. No place to hide. Not so much as a closet nor a potted fern. Before he could weigh another course of action, the penthouse door opened, and he found himself facing a dozen flabbergasted Air Pirates. At first they were so surprised to see him that no one moved.

"Uh...hi, guys!" Kit said awkwardly, inching toward the elevator. "Long time no see. But, uh, I was just leaving, so--"

It was Will who took the initiative. "Get him!" he ordered. Hacksaw, Mad Dog, Hal and a blur of other familiar faces lunged at him. Kit wasn't afraid of a fight, and fight he did. Hal soon fell back, whining over what would soon be a black eye, and Mad Dog reeled in a daze after a blow to the nose. The pirates far outnumbered the lone bear, however, and he eventually found himself pinned to the floor.

A distinctive and all-too-familiar voice came from above. "Well, well, well. If it is not Mister Cloudkicker. What a surprise to see you here."

Kit twisted his neck, straining against his captors, but the burly canines pressed down harder. He managed to hold his head high enough to catch a glimpse of the speaker, although he knew who it was. Don Karnage stood glaring down at him, dressed in an unusually plain white shirt and dark pants.

"To what do I owe the honor?" he said mockingly.

"Screw you," Kit snapped.

"Still the same, bad-in-the-mouth little hairball, eh?" Karnage stooped to pick up the room service menu Kit had dropped. "And lookie what you brought me. Working as a bellhop now, my boy?"

"Me? A bellhop? Yeah, right! You can just shove that menu up--"

Hacksaw slammed the bear's head against the thin carpet, and his consciousness fled in a cascade of colored lights. Karnage shook his head disdainfully. "Not in front of the ladies! Tsk, tsk, tsk. Such horrible manners."

Katarina turned to her sister. "Who's the kid?"

"Long story. Later," Scarlet said quietly.

"Take him inside and tie him up," Karnage ordered, his sarcastic smile fading.

Will stepped up beside his leader. "I wonder how much he heard, or if anyone else knows we're here."

"He will tell us," Karnage said darkly. "Whether he wants to or not. That boy is not going to ruin my plans again." A hard frown took over his face.

Scarlet put a hand on his arm. "Don't do anything drastic, querido. Please," she said quietly.

Karnage said nothing.

Chapter 6
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