Konundrum
by Katie Sullivan
Chapter 5
Once the Iron Vulture was moored a safe distance offshore, Don Karnage, Scarlet, Mad
Dog and Dumptruck got into CT-37's and flew over to the beach. They kicked up a large
swirl of sand, disturbing what was otherwise a deserted cove.
All was tranquil, a true tropical paradise. Scarlet scrambled out of the plane she
borrowed from the Vulture and sniffed the floral-scented air as she got her bearings. The
fact that the towering Dumptruck was never more than five feet away did not escape her
notice. Karnage didn't trust her. She didn't blame him.
But she had no plans to escape. "This way," she said at last, pointing into the
jungle. Mad Dog groaned in protest when he saw the dark, thick foliage she indicated.
"We go straight north from here until we hit the stream."
"Very well. Lead away, my gorgeous guide." Karnage bowed gallantly and waved her on.
Scarlet drew her dagger and hacked back the densest bushes and vines. The task wasn't easy with her small blade, but a sudden swish of metal cleared the way. "Er, thanks," she said as Karnage sheathed his sword.
"De nada."
It was easier to move when they got farther back into the jungle. After a five minute hike, they abruptly found themselves ankle-deep in a cool stream. It was clear and small, only a few yards across, and had a soft, sandy bottom. Karnage's boots kept his feet dry, but the other pirates were a little soggier.
"Now we go upstream a few hundred feet..." Scarlet let her voice trail off in concentration as she sloshed through the shallows, squinting into the shadowy trees. The three pirates followed close on her heels. "It should be right about...here!" She stopped unexpectedly, and Dumptruck stumbled into her back, followed by Mad Dog, and all three toppled awkwardly forward into the ferns.
"You imbeciles--" Karnage began to scold.
Suddenly, the ground beneath the tangle of fallen pirates crumbled away, and they slipped
into a sinkhole in a mess of flailing limbs, tails and weapons. When the dust and plant
shreds settled, all four were sprawled in a heap on the floor of a small limestone cavern.
"Get off me, you heavy hooligans!" Karnage grouched, pushing Dumptruck's legs
and most of Mad Dog off his aching body.
A soiled and shaken but otherwise unharmed Scarlet nudged him sharply in the side. "Same goes for you, Captain. You're sitting on my tail!"
"Oh. Lo siento." Karnage stood and Scarlet yanked her bushy tail away. ("Sorry.")
"Ow."
"Now then, what is this? A cave?" Karnage looked around at their new surroundings. The shallow limestone cavern was dry, devoid of any recent formations. The few stalagmites that had once grown there were crushed into fine gravel by someone's feet. Scarlet's?
"This," she said, gesturing farther back into the rock chamber, "is where I keep my secret cache."
"You said it wasn't buried!"
"It's not. It's underground, but it isn't buried."
"Enough of this hide-and-go-peek! You have led me on the chase of wild gooses long enough, señorita! Where are the jewels?" Don Karnage waved his sword threateningly.
"Right here, Captain," she said with a grin. Walking in a stooped position to compensate for the low, jagged ceiling, Scarlet went further into the shadowy recesses of the rock chamber. She dropped to her knees in the dirt and wiggled the upper part of her body into a crevice near the floor. Her arm disappeared up to her shoulder as she felt blindly for the treasure. At last, she drew her hand out, clutching something. She turned back to her companions, opened her fingers, grinned, and revealed the Humberfeather Diamond.
The pirates greedily ogled the enormous, gleaming jewel. The finely-polished gem was nearly the size of a golf ball. "Yes! At last!" She kissed the gem and laughed happily. "My pride and joy! The Humberfeather Diamond!"
Karnage was stunned at the size of the stone. In all his piratical career, he had never seen a larger diamond. He ached to snatch it from her, run and leave her stranded. But he had given his solemn vow of honor, and breaking it wasn't an option. He had to draw the line somewhere, and there the line had stood for a long time. No, like it or not, the diamond was hers. However...
He drew his sword and stood tall. Might as well make the best out of an enfuriating situation. "Fine, fine, fine, it is a lovely little stone. Now where are my jewels?
"Little?" Mad Dog began. "Cap'n, that thing's the size of--"
"Quiet!" Karnage hissed, slapping his lackey.
"Oh, yes, of course," Scarlet said. She tucked the Humberfeather Diamond in a deep pocket of her leather flight jacket. "I keep the diamond, and you get a sack of other jewels, right? That was our agreement."
"Sí."
"It's a deal?"
"Yes, yes. Now where are they?"
Scarlet turned, knelt, and reached into the crevice once again. She came up with a small leather pouch. "Here y'go!" she said with a smug expression, tossing it to him.
Karnage caught the bag and looked inside. There were a few small rings and loose gemstones, none bigger than the head of a ballpoint pen. "This-- This--" he stammered.
"What is it, Captain?" Mad Dog asked as he and Dumptruck crowded in close to see.
"Ya, vhat?"
"This...this is nothing!"
The two other pirates peered into the pouch at the pitiful contents.
A growl of rage started low in Karnage's throat, growing into an enraged roar. "YOU CHEATED ME!" He spun on Scarlet with sword drawn, only to find her missing. "After her!"
He followed Mad Dog and Dumptruck up the rocky incline, out of the cave, and into the
light of day. Blinking in the sun, they searched for the vixen.
Karnage lashed out at a hapless bush with his blade, hacking it to shreds. "No one
betrays Don Karnage and gets away with it! When I find that sinister señorita, I
will bash her head in with that diamond and leave her tripes for the seagulls! No, I will
hang her upside down in a shark tank covered in steak sauce! And maybe some paprika... No,
no, I will have her dropped off a cliff into the ocean, tied to a big piano! I'll take a
turnip and a piece of sandpaper and--"
"Cap'n, over here!" came Mad Dog's shrill voice.
Karnage was at his side in an instant. "Where?"
A trail of crushed ferns marked Scarlet's flight, and was soon widened by the trio of
rushing pirates. Karnage attacked the foliage savagely, slicing a path where one already
existed. "How dare that traitorous tart cross me, the dread pirate Captain Don
Karnage?" he stormed. "That mutinous mujer! That two-faced troublemaker!
That brain-lacking, lying, dishonest little cheating-person!" He soon ran out of
insults in English and lapsed into vehement Spanish curses.
The trail ended, dispersed into tall grasses along the beach. The sand showed no fresh
tracks, and the CT-37's were untouched. Some distance offshore the Iron Vulture was
moored. Nothing seemed amiss.
"Split up, men! Find that wench or I'll have your hides as throw-rugs!"
Mad Dog and Dumptruck took off in opposite directions along the beach, and Karnage turned
back into the jungle.
He was less than thirty feet from the beach when a small metal can fell from an overhanging tree. Before he realized what it was, a puff of green smoke whooshed out, overwhelming his senses. There was a rushing noise in his ears, a stench that froze the breath in his lungs, and a sense of being detatched from his body. As he tottered out of consciousness, he saw a smirking vixen jump nimbly from the tree. His head spinning, he fell forward...
...into the arms of Scarlet Hindenfur.
Then all was blackness.
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This story and the character Scarlet are © Katie Sullivan and may not
be used without permisson. Don Karnage, the Air Pirates, Mad Dog, Dumptruck, Cape Suzette,
Tale Spin and all related indica, etc, are © The Walt Disney Company and are used without
permisson for non-profit entertainment purposes only.